“Stop This Train”

“Stop this train
I want to get off and go home again
I can’t take the speed it’s moving in
I know I can’t
But, honestly, won’t someone stop this train?”

I am at the age where everything starts to change. Before I know it, everything will be different. I’m accustomed to seeing the same people, at the same time, at the same place. Even if I don’t know these people personally, I know their faces and can guess at their stories.

I guess it’s a little bittersweet, as most things are. Or maybe this is a lot bittersweet, I’m just not sure if it’s more bitter or more sweet yet. I’ll let you know.

Even thought I haven’t had to say my final “it’s not a goodbye, it’s a see you later,” type of messages, I’m starting to realize the reality of it. I’m starting to realize that soon, maybe a few months from now, I might have to say goodbye to some of my closest friends for the last time. And before then, I’m going to have to share my last smiles as I pass unsuspecting people in the hallways and send more familiar glances to the people I’ve only managed to become acquaintances with. It’s a sad realization as I think about all the memories I’ve made with all these people that I love, but it’s even more sad that I didn’t manage to do that with some MOST of them. I hope they enjoy where they’re going, because you can’t always “stop this train.” Right now it’s full speed ahead, and I don’t see it stopping anytime soon.

“So scared of getting older
I’m only good at being young
So I play the numbers game
To find a way to say that life has just begun
Had a talk with my old man”
-John Mayer, “Stop This Train”

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